Nelson Branco on Jarlena Exit: "Sickening to Watch"

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From somewhere adrift on Cameron Mathison's Love Boat, TV Guide Canada's Nelson Branco filed his latest Nelson Ratings, where he took Ken "The Soap Opera Slayer" Corday and the rest of his den of vipers to task for their shoddy treatment of exiting daytime legends Deidre Hall and Drake Hogestyn during their final air show as Days of Our Lives' top couple John and Marlena.

Jarlena

Here's what the ever-bashful Canadian had to say:

Did you catch DAYS’ lame ass and extremely sloppy send-off for inarguably its biggest super-couple ever this past Friday? If you didn’t, you were lucky. For those of us who did, Deidre Hall and Drake Hogestyn’s 20-minute send-off was simply sickening to watch. Let’s review: our hero John Black regained his memory but was castrated in every sense of the word due to his paralysis from the neck down. The definitive super-couple wed in the cheapest, most unimaginative and agenda-pushing wedding in the history of daytime. Just thinking of this shameful “story” makes me want to throw up.

We hear  head writer Dena Higley was too busy playing Mrs. Pac Man to give a response, but whenever she makes it up to Canada, she plans to give Branco quite the talkin' to! Meanwhile, the little boy who plays poor, Autistic Theo was busy penning Daniel and Chloe's red hot love scenes. This explains why they are so good.