Dear God in Soap Heaven, it looks like the rumors were true. New York Daily News writer Carolyn Hinsey confirmed today that Victor and Ashley (Eric Braeden and Eileen Davidson) are expecting a child on The Young and the Restless. I have to say right here and now, I owe a thousand pardons to our Y&R blogger Jillian Bowe. A few weeks back she asked me to check into this rumored plot twist and I totally dismissed it.
"Oh no, that sounds too ridiculous! They won't do that!" I scoffed haughtily with soap-righteous indigestion. "Not on Y&R, Ashley's barren! Besides she's in her 50''s! They don't DO such outlandish things on The Young and the Restless, Jillian! Okay, so there was the time they killed a man via trash compactor..."
"But my sources are telling me..." Jillian began.
"Silence!" I snapped, standing up from my couch, cell phone transfixed hotly to my ear. I was inspired by Judith Chapman's recent courtroom performance. "How dare you even so much as utter such blasphemous nonsense about Y&R?! This isn't the last season of Another World where an 800-year-old Rachel Cory got pregnant, or Guiding Light where a cancer-stricken Reva Shayne's late-life pregnancy has Kim Zimmer walking around with a basketball tucked under her blouse during Winter in Peapack! I won't allow you to even suggest that The Young and the Restless, daytime's saving grace, would do something so silly as to have a barren, post-menopausal, breast cancer survivor, become pregnant by a near-70-year-old man, who has already had at least one vasectomy! You simply musn't even think of repeating such utter nonsense to anyone do you here me Jillian Bowe? Do you (I loved The Breakfast Club)? We will be laughed off the soap-o-sphere! Roger Newcomb will shun Luke at soap website publisher conventions. Not even Molly Burnett will take my interview requests! Ken Corday will call us hacks! As God and The Ghost ofIrna Phillips are my witnesses, I can't let you do this Jillian, I won't!'
I guess the joke is on me.