The Bold and the Beautiful’s teen set took center stage at the beginning of last week. Sweet-yet-drippy Hope battled with supposed “vixen” Steffy for the affections of Oliver. Oh, how we yawned. Is Steffy starting to have real feelings for the DJ-turned-filmmaker? Or is she just out to make Hope’s life hell? It’s a mystery. As is the reason a school dance was held at Forrester Creations in the first place. Another mystery: why does that fool Marcus keep cheerleading for Steffy? She already admitted to hating the Logans, and would gladly have his mother thrown out of FC on her derriere. Yet still he stands around, all "aw, shucks, Steffy, you’re awesome." We learned that he has a girlfriend, so at least Mr Smiles is getting some.
Predictably, Aggie was stopped from blurting out Bridget’s secret in front of Nick (i.e. Isaw you banging your mother’s husband! My brother videoed it! Take a look!).Instead, Nick butted in and reminded them what good friends they used to be. Yep, sure they were. I remember a time they were going to yoga and had a salad in Bridget’s office, and I think they might have been for coffee at Insomnia. But, great friends? I don’t think so. Anyway, the bottom line is Bridget offered Aggie her job back. As a result, she deleted the video of Owen and Bridget going at it. Meanwhile, Owen and Bridget had another heart to heart, with him reminding her that Jackie and Nick could never find out about their grief sex.
Aggie’s cousin Whip cooked up a plan with his ex-wife Brooke. They arranged a double date at Cafe Russe with their significant others to test Taylor’s feelings for (part-man, part-beast) Ridge. Taylor and Ridge had a blast remembering their past, and Brooke warned Whip about his future. Alas, Taylor changed her tune when the maitre d’ uttered the words “man and horse”. Yes, it was that funny she nearly combusted right there, before desert had even been served.
Taylor flashes back to the moment she and Ridge were pronounced "Man and Horse"
Her maniacal laughter was apparently “proof” that she wasn’t hung up on Ridge. Despite the cackling, Whip and Taylor were actually quite sweet; for once I thought there might be something between them. They went back to Taylor’s and he proposed. He didn’t want a long engagement, so she suggested tying the knot next week. Bada bing, bada boom: here comes a wedding for B&B’s newest insta-love couple.
"One time my undead corpse was stolen and replaced with a wax dummy!
What a scream!"
Donna worried that her relationship was in trouble. With Eric and Stephanie getting closer at FC, and loony Pam mocking her about her weight (
is pregnant), things didn’t look good for Donna. She went over to see Katie, and finding she was out, spilled her guts to Bill instead. For once, I liked Donna’s scenes a lot, and she is looking more like the blonde bombshell she’s supposed to be with a little meat on her bones. Donna and Eric I cannot stomach at all, but I hope the Bill thing remains platonic. It would be good to see him in the Logans’ corner for the next power struggle/business storyline, rather than having him passed between the sisters for boinking purposes.
You got any honey in that bag?
As for Eric and Stephanie, they started getting fresh in his office after Donna and Pam had left. He’d been spouting some nonsense about Donna’s disloyalty due to her filming of
, and Stephanie was all "my life won’t be complete until I’m in your bed." They kissed. What would that horny old goat want with the emasculating ball-breaker known as The Stephmonster? And why would she want his cheating ass back? I think they must both be more senile than Beth Logan (currently offscreen putting her shoes in the fridge).
And this is just the entree, big boy.
After Taylor and Whip left, Brooke and Ridge shared one last dance at Cafe Russe, which was closing its doors that night. So, it’s goodbye Cafe Russe, hello kiddie dances at Forrester. I hope the next set to get the chop is the manky old steamroom; the thought Eric and Stephanie doing the funky monkey in there scares me.