Sunday’s True Blood began right where things left off for Sookie (Anna Paquin) and Alcide (JoeManganiello). They made it to the bedroom while making out. Shirts came off. Alcide growled he’d wanted to do this for “so long.” Then, Sookie got a look of horror on her face, bent over, and threw up all over Alcide’s shoes. As if the mood hadn’t been killed enough already, this was when Bill (Stephen Moyer) and Eric (Alexander Skarsgard) walked in, with the Viking vamp quipping, “Alcide, you sure know how to treat a lady.” When Sookie saw both her exes there, she dry heaved.
The vampire duo was there to get Sookie’s help in unglamouring Alcide’s boss, who they thought would probably know who dug up Russell’s body. Still a little drunk, Sookie just threw her hands up in the air and went with it—it’s just another day in Bon Temps when she has to help defeat murderous supernaturals who want her blood!
Drunk Sookie was still on fire this week. She should be required at least once per season from now on. Who wants to start the Twitter campaign? #DrunkSookie
Sookie, her three paramours, and Alcide’s terrified boss began following his uncovered memories, which took them to an abandoned insane asylum. They also learned a female member of The Authority was the one who rescued Russell. Bill started sniping at Eric because he thought it was Nora who rescued him, but Eric disagreed. I thought everyone knew it was that shifty Salome by now! It’s also due to her manipulations that they are given until dawn to find Russell, or get their remote iPhone stakes activated.
When Bill suggested they split up at the eerie asylum, Sookie balked, saying, “I've seen enough horror movies to know you don't split up when you're in a big scary asylum and there's a crazed killer on the loose!” That place was mad creepy. Especially when you factor in the room full of corpses getting munched on by a horde of rats, and the other room full of terrified humans strung up waiting to die. When our gang of Scoobies walked in on that, they questioned them, then left. How thoughtful. I wonder if Eric was reminded of his own human torture chamber underneath Fangtasia?
They found an almost fully-recuperated Russell Edington sitting up in bed. He immediately began criticizing their sleuthing skills, but in a deliciously pleasant way. When Eric said they were there to finally kill him, Russell invoked his dearly-departed Talbot, and cooed they could try. Then, he went right after Sookie’s coveted fairy blood.
But most importantly… Russell’s back! Russell Ednington, played masterfully by the talented Denis O’Hare returned five long episodes into the current season. After playing on American Horror Story last season, Denis O’Hare must have felt right at home in that haunted manse! Russell Edington is one of the best characters in the True Blood universe. Who else was thrilled to hear his murderously polite Southern drawl?
Jason (RyanKwanten) and Andy (Chris Bauer) turned up home from the fairy club, naked, without any memory of how they got there. Next, they began investigating the deaths of Sam’s (Sam Trammell) shifter friends. They determined they were shot by someone targeting supernaturals. Sam went to worn Luna. When he was leaving they were both shot by the same group of killers. It looked like Luna was dead right there, while Sam laid bleeding on the ground, and screamed for little Emma to run to safety. She did, right after shifting into her little wolf self.
Pam (Kristin Bauer) has taken Tara (Rutina Wesley) under her wing, complete with a hot new wardrobe, and a job tending bar at Fangtasia. Tara’s looking good, but she feels like a drag queen slave. And she was confused when she got in trouble for feeding on a human in public. Jessica (Deborah Ann Woll) came into the club, and offered her sympathies. The bonded over being young-vampires-against-their-wills-girls-unliving-in-a-modern-world, and how being a vampire gets better.
The topic of their conversation was so out of this world, but it seemed so normal for this pair. You kept waiting for Tara to say something nasty, and have Jessica slink off, but Jessica reached out, and Tara responded positively. Jessica has been the first to really get through to Vamp Tara and help her accept her new life. It has been nice to see Tara interacting with the vampire characters on this show, without acting like they’re her enemy. Now she just saves her hostility for everyone else!
Hoyt came to Fangtasia looking like a total fangbanger, dressed like an Emo middle-schooler. He caught Tara on her cigarette break. (Yeah, apparently she smokes now. Vampirism > Cancer). Then, Hoyt totally propositioned Tara, and it was so embarrassing! She almost didn’t go for it, but then she took him to the bathroom to feed. Jessica was in there feeding on Tara’s snack from earlier, when she heard Hoyt, and flipped out. She went into the stall next door and pulled Tara off her ex-boyfriend. A vampire catfight ensued. So, the Tara-Jessica friendship seems over. Guess besties having the same “type” never ends well!
I can not wait to see Hoyt’s Mama’s reaction to him dating Tara! She hated Jessica, and Jessica used to actually be respectful. There’s never been any love-loss between Mrs. Fortenberry and Tara, plus the former is the biggest bigot in Bon Temps!
Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis) was freaked out because of his demon alter-ego and asked Jesus’ spirit for guidance. He thought his call went unanswered, but later he woke up to a horrible surprise. The severed head of Jesus, with his lips sewed shut was sitting on Lafayette’s coffee table trying to communicate. Lafayette couldn’t understand anything because he was too busy screaming.
Next, Jesus appeared to Lafayette’s crazy(?) mom in the same state. She had no problem understanding the “Mmm. Mmm-ing” corpse head and said she’d give Lafayette the message.
Eller took Terry (Todd Lowe) and Patrick (Scott Foley) hostage in his fireproof bunker. One of their civilian casualties from Iraq had cursed them as she died. Terry had wanted to try and save her, but Patrick ordered him to finish her off because they couldn’t have any witnesses of what Eller had done, while they’d been drinking and doing pills. Now a smoke monster called an Ifrit was hunting them all down, and killing them with fire. Terry believed Eller, and said he also saw the monster. He made Eller let them go because all together, they’re sitting ducks for the monster. Patrick thought he was just crazy, and when he’s released he tied Eller up. Terry fled, and Patrick chased him, insisting Eller must be the killer. As he got Terry to reluctantly agree, the Ifrit burned Eller alive.
Now, please, may this storyline end. At the very least maybe it can dovetail into Lafayette’s blah storyline and then they can both end together. Preferably next episode.
What did you guys think of “Let’s Boot and Rally?”
Photo Credit: HBO